Chapter 24

 

The entire Town was covered with snow, and Elizabeth’s eyes sparkled with delight as she walked the gleaming white paths on her husband’s arm. Since the first morning of their married life, five days earlier, they had taken long strolls in the same park where they had met in June. Apart from this meaningful digression, they preferred to stay home and enjoy their newly discovered marital bliss.

Though they received many invitations, they accepted none. Neither was disposed to entertain either strangers or friends; they had yet to see Cassandra and Georgiana or the Colonel. A day earlier, the Gardiners had returned from Hertfordshire, and the newlyweds did call – very briefly – in Gracechurch Street. However, they declined to remain for dinner and, wisely, Mrs. Gardiner did not insist.

Their time was mostly spent in the library or the music room; and, with every passing day, their bond became stronger as they came to know each other more intimately – in every sense.

She was as lively as ever, whereas he was less restrained and less serious than before – a change quickly noticed by everyone around them; and, with her naturally easy ways, Elizabeth became the favourite of the staff almost as soon as she entered the house.

Darcy was somewhat annoyed one morning when he overheard two maids gossiping about how fortunate they were that he had chosen a wife so different from him in disposition and manners. For a moment, he had considered dismissing them, but then thought better of it. After all, they were right; he knew he was a fair master, and the servants were content with their lives in his home, but he had never been a joyful presence. Elizabeth, however, brought liveliness to his home – and to his life.

“We should return home,” Darcy said, covering her gloved hand with his. “Your hair is full of snow, and your cheeks are crimson. I am sure your feet and hands are frozen.”

“I am not cold at all, William, quite the contrary. I have always enjoyed walking through snow. I feel very well, exceedingly well, I might say!” She sounded as enthusiastic as a child, and he felt an urge to kiss her red cheeks.

“Very well, we will stay fifteen more minutes. Is this acceptable?”

“Am I allowed to negotiate, sir?”

“Not really, as you promised to obey me,” he replied with mocking severity.

Thus began one of their little games during the last few days. They teased each other until their play turned into a minor skirmish. He loved to see her blushing and then narrowing her eyes in search of a sharp reply. Her lips twisted and her eyebrow raised in challenge reminded him of the beginning of their acquaintance and their lively conversations at Netherfield. The only difference was that now he could do what he was not allowed back then: whenever he felt she was about to win their arguments, he simply made use of his strength and silenced her with a kiss. She always accused him of improper behaviour; and, indeed, she was right. Only six month before, he would have considered that sort of reaction shocking and abominable. Now he could not imagine a day – or an hour – without tasting the sweetness of her lips.

“Be as you like, Mr. Darcy. I shall obey, but only because we have to finish packing and prepare for dining at Cassandra’s tonight.”

“Any excuse is welcome to take you home; I would not want you to catch a cold and be ill all the way to Pemberley.”

“Will there be snow at Pemberley, do you think?”

“I hope so…for your sake.” He took his glove off and removed the snow from her hair; he briefly touched her face, but it was warm.

“I told you I am not cold,” she whispered.

“So you did,” he agreed. “I should have known that you are always as warm as a sunny day.” With a short glance around, he placed a soft kiss on her cheek.

They returned home through snow that was now ankle-deep. Elizabeth’s petticoat seemed frozen, yet she did not mind at all. She continued to chat with Darcy; and, every time she looked at him, the snow falling from the sky tickled her face, and she laughed while she lost herself in her husband’s loving glance.

“Thank God you are home!” the housekeeper cried as soon as they entered, in a tone more proper for a mother. “You must be frozen – you should go upstairs immediately; your baths will be ready within minutes. A cup of hot tea will do wonders for your state,” she added as she removed Elizabeth’s bonnet.

“Thank you so much, Mrs. … You are a mind reader.” Elizabeth smiled warmly. “Hot tea and a warm bath will be truly wonderful.”

The efficiency of Darcy’s staff was proven – again – less than a quarter hour later, when the mistress and master of the house were each enjoying a cup of tasteful tea inside their warm, relaxing tubs – each in his or her own private rooms, of course.

As soon as the hot water enveloped her, Elizabeth felt drowsy and closed her eyes, sighing with contentment. Her body was heavy with fatigue, and her eyelids seemed unwilling to open. In fact, it was not quite fatigue, but more a lack of sleep. She had not slept an entire night in more than a month, first from apprehension before the wedding, and then…

She felt her cheeks burning at the thought of their previous nights. Her husband had shared her bed every night, as he promised, and it was bliss to sleep in his arms. Well, actually, it was not quite sleeping, as most of the night was spent in…certain activities. And afterward, it was difficult to fall asleep; his scent, his warmth, his arms confining her – every sensation was entirely new for her. Consequently, she usually slept only a few hours before the sun was up and she had to awaken.

Of course, she could have asked to be allowed to sleep longer during the day, but that was unacceptable. How could she spend the first days of her marriage sleeping and abandoning her husband? That would not do – especially when she had the fortune to marry the most generous, kind and loving husband!

Indeed, Darcy was everything she had hoped for and so much more. Every day she spent with him was a chance to discover fresh, intimate details that only made her love him more.

Many of his former habits remained, of course – including the mask of severity that marred his countenance when he was displeased or preoccupied with something. He was the master of the house and the master of Pemberley, and she understood only a smattering of his duties from the papers that constantly covered his desk.

There were so many people dependent upon him, so many responsibilities to burden him, that it was no wonder he was frequently serious and distant. She invited him to share his worries, and he was as surprised – and pleased – with her interest as she was gratified by his confidence in her. He did not hesitate to answer any of her questions or to explain anything she wanted to know about his business. She felt she was treated not just with deep affection, but also with great consideration; he declared that he felt spoiled by her love and by her genuine interest in everything connected with him. What more could she want?

Then, when the evening came, they would retire to their apartments. There, he set aside all restraint, self-control, rules, and duties. There, he was simply her husband. One evening – the third day of their marriage – she pointed this out, and he replied, while taking her in his arms, “I am your husband all the time, my dearest; here I am your lover.” And so he was.

Though Elizabeth had known something of a wife’s duties before her marriage, her knowledge was contradictory.

She had heard – from many whispers spread around – that those activities were very unpleasant for a lady, and that most women tried to keep their husband’s nightly visits as rare as possible. In fact, those un-pleasantries were the main reason many ladies accepted that their husbands kept mistresses. Elizabeth started to question the accuracy of this theory when she was about 16 and had heard that some ladies of society kept lovers themselves. Why would a lady – who had money, position and influence – indulge in such activities, risking the ruin of her reputation, if those activities were abhorrent? She even dared to address that delicate question to her Aunt Gardiner, and the lady laughed for a time before she regained her composure enough to offer Elizabeth an answer – one that was honest, albeit ‘dressed’ in suitable language.

Elizabeth never doubted her aunt, so she trusted implicitly the revelation that, where there was affection and understanding between man and wife, and where the husband was concerned not only for his well being but for his wife’s as well, the intimacy of marriage was nothing to fear or worry about – quite the contrary.

Moreover, since the first moments she had admitted her feelings for Darcy, every time he touched her hand, danced with her, or merely smiled at her, the shivers that spread over her body were excellent indications that her aunt had been right in this respect – as always.

Of course, their engagement – as trying as it was – offered Elizabeth more reasons to feel confident and eager about what would come in her marriage. However, everything she knew proved pale in comparison to the reality she discovered on her wedding night.

That was not a duty to perform; it was the most intimate way of receiving her husband’s love through his unleashed passion.

Of course, Elizabeth understood very well how fortunate she was, how privileged she was among so many women who were less happy in their marriages. She knew that the exquisite pleasure her husband so generously offered her every night was something most precious, something for which she had cause to be grateful. His soft, breathtaking kisses and tender caresses were proof of that care and consideration her aunt had spoken of so many years ago. In truth, she felt that Darcy was more concerned with her wishes than his and preoccupied with giving her pleasure long before he sought his own.

In those significant days since her wedding, Elizabeth learned that, for him, as a man, the pleasure, the fulfilment came from the act itself – precisely that part of their lovemaking that was less pleasant and still somewhat awkward for her.

She did like being united with her husband – she liked it from the first time, despite the considerable pain she had to suffer on their wedding night. She liked to feel his weight upon her, to listen to his cries of pleasure, to feel his passionate thrusts inside her and that warmth spread in her body when his moment came. Fortunately, the pain had diminished over time and become bearable; perhaps her body had managed to accommodate him; or perhaps it had become accustomed to the pain; regardless, her discomfort was less perceptible day by day.

Still, for her, it was not so much her own pleasure, as it was a sense of happiness for sharing that complete intimacy with her beloved husband. It was the final proof that, regarding a wife’s duties, both parts were correct: sharing a marriage bed could be a horribly unpleasant duty, something a woman should try to escape from as much as she could, or it could be a very enjoyable affair, something to anticipate eagerly.

As for her and her husband, Elizabeth was certain their situation was very special, as they were – unquestionably – the happiest couple in the world in every respect.

She laughed at her own musings, wondering what Darcy was doing and how long she had been in the tub, lost in her thoughts; she hoped she would have some time to rest a little before they left.

The maid helped her out, and Elizabeth allowed her to retire.

Elizabeth looked at her bed and then moved closer to the door and listened carefully. A moment later, she rolled her eyes in exasperation. What was this ridiculous behaviour? Surely, she could go and knock at her husband’s door if she wanted to know what he was doing.

She did so, and his voice invited her in; he was at the desk, reading some letters, but he seemed very content to see her.

“Come in, please,” he said, hurrying to take her hand.

“I do not want to disturb you; I was only curious about what you were doing, but please return to your papers. I will go and rest while you finish.”

“My papers can wait,” he replied. “They held my attention only while you were not here. I can do little when you are away, because I think of you all the time. You are very dangerous for my business, Mrs. Darcy.” He placed a long kiss in her palm and she shivered.

“Are you cold?” he inquired instantly.

“No…”

“But you shivered.”

“Yes…”

Her voice turned more hesitant as his became more grave; he stared at her a moment, then a smile twisted his lips. “I see…” he said.

Then he took her hand in his and his thumb traced small circles in her palm, right where his lips had rested a moment before. “This is why you shivered?” he inquired, and she felt she was melting. She forced a smile and nodded silently.

“Then we must do something about that shiver,” he concluded and unexpectedly lifted her in his arms. She gasped and put her arms around his neck.

“Shall I take you to your room and allow you to rest? Or will you stay here with me?” he asked seriously, while his strong palm stroked her shoulder.

Their eyes were locked, and she easily recognized that expression; his fingers were burning her through the thin fabric and his mouth was now dangerously close to hers.

“But it is the middle of the day,” she managed to say just before their lips joined.

“Yes, I am well aware of that.”

It seemed that he did not really need an answer as he laid her on the bed and moved to her side. He took her hands again and tantalized both her palms with his fingers while his lips travelled along her face, to her earlobe and down to her neck. When his mouth reached the edge of the gown, his hands abandoned hers and hurried to pull the fabric down, then cupped her breasts; her skin was silkier than the gown and his hungry mouth only hesitated briefly before he tasted it.

She moaned and her back arched toward him; he lifted his eyes to look at her and kissed her lips gently. “Elizabeth, please tell me if you want me to stop; if you really want to rest, I will leave you this instant,” he whispered.

“The servant may enter,” she replied breathlessly.

“That is not what I asked you, dearest,” he smiled, kissing her once more. “Nobody will disturb us if that is your worry. My worry is what you wish me to do.” She swallowed the lump in her throat; it was full daylight and her husband was only a few inches from her, staring at her with a passion that made her tremble. She knew he desired her, and she wanted nothing more than to obey his desire. “Please cover me with the sheets,” she said. He did so in an instant, as though he was afraid she would change her mind. Yet, there was no danger of that on her part.

By then, her mind and body were both prepared for what would come. She anticipated each touch, each caress, each kiss that followed on her neck, on her shoulders, on her breasts now free from the gown; and then her thighs opened just a moment before his hand travelled there, and she moaned loudly even before his daring fingers slid inside her folds. She heard him laughing briefly before he kissed her deeply again – and she knew he was content with her response. His mouth abandoned hers and started its journey down her body; Elizabeth wondered how it was possible that, though her head was spinning wildly, her mind was registering so vividly every single moment, every sensation she experienced.

Several exquisite moments later, her body, already consumed by pleasure, started to burn inside, longing for him. Almost instantly, his kisses and caresses became more fervent, and he parted her legs; she felt him lying upon her, careful not to crush her, and she tensed, awaiting the usual pain to come – and to go. He entered her with some urgency, and the expectant cry escaped her lips, but this time her anticipation was wrong. There was no pain at all. Her body remained still; he noticed and stopped moving.

“Elizabeth?”

Still incredulous, she opened her eyes and met his – and she breathed deeply while she smiled at him.

For the first time in their marriage, her body started to move first, tentatively, then more and more confidently. She was not certain what was happening, nor did she dare to think of it too much. The rhythm of his thrusts soon became wilder and deeper, and she was certain that moment would come soon; and, for the first time, she wished it would last longer.

However, she was wrong again. His movements slowed, and she felt his torso rising up from her; through her eyelashes, she saw him kneeling between her thighs, staring at her. She was completely exposed to his eyes now, the sheet long gone. He continued to move inside her slowly as his hands caressed her legs, her hips, her belly, and finally rested upon her breasts and cupped them with renewed possessiveness. She cried so loudly that he pressed a finger to her lips, and then leaned down to cover her mouth with his.

She could feel his manhood pulsing inside her and thrusting harder. Her hips joined that pace, as eager as his were, and they moved together until, in desperate need of air, she broke their kiss. She cried out again, shocked by another novelty: each of his thrusts built a fire inside her that spread and burned her very core, igniting every inch of her skin. Waves of pleasure shattered her body and she was certain she had fainted. She was proved wrong – again – when she felt that well-known warmth cooling the fire inside her and his weight falling upon her.

“Oh my God, Elizabeth…” he whispered after a time, kissing her palm tenderly as they lay side by side.

Her fingers caressed his, but she did not look at him yet. She was now covered with the sheet, though there was no use for it.

“What happened?” he inquired and held his breath.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean – it was…somehow different…you were different…”

He could not find the proper words, and only continued to caress her hand gently before pulling her to his chest. She sighed and remained silent, her fingers entwined with his.

“Elizabeth…? I know you were not comfortable to do that now, but I hope you feel confident enough in my presence to tell me if my insistence upset you.”

“You did not upset me, you know that; but I confess I am not completely at ease yet with…you know. I mean – we never…you know…during the day…” she replied with obvious embarrassment. “On the other hand, you cannot expect me to become completely at ease with every aspect of marriage in less than a week, would you not agree, sir?”

He laughed and kissed her other hand. “You are correct, of course, my dearest.” He paused and she felt him looking carefully at her while his voice betrayed his amusement. “Perhaps if we were to practice daily, any uneasiness would pass very soon.”

“You are insufferable, sir!” she censured him with mocking severity. His shameless, insinuating flirtation succeeded in easing her embarrassment, and his obvious good mood lifted her spirit and gave her the courage to confess her intimate secret.

“It was very different than before, you were right....”

“In a good way?” he interrupted her, hesitantly, and she chuckled.

“In a very good way,” she admitted, averting her eyes for a moment. “For the first time, there was no pain at all when you…you know…” She blushed.

To Elizabeth’s surprise, instead of words of relief, a long silence followed. She could see the concern in his eyes while a furrow of worry appeared between his eyebrows.

“Elizabeth, what are you saying? Do you mean that, until now, every time was painful for you?”

She tried to find the proper ways to explained it but he continued, his face now pale. “So all this time I hurt you?”

“William, you never hurt me… It is just that –”

“Please, my dearest, you know what I meant. Were you in pain each and every time?”

She nodded, suddenly regretful for her unfortunate slip of words.

“But why did you not tell me? I was so demanding, so insistent all this time that you could not resist me?”

“To tell you what, William? I knew that for a woman it would be painful, I expected it to be so – I expected it to be even worse. In fact, I confess that the intimacy of marriage is more…enjoyable than I hoped it would be, even in a marriage based on love…”

He seemed to pay more attention to his own thoughts than to her words as his torment grew. “I had no idea, no idea at all… In my selfishness, I was certain you enjoyed to share your bed with me. I thought you welcomed my attentions.”

“I did, William! Trust me, my husband – you have no reason to worry, and I have no reason to complain. The pain diminished with time…and I became accustomed to it. Besides, how could I have refused you something that gave you so much pleasure when you have been so generous and caring with me every time, when… I like being with you; I cannot and I do not want to resist you,” she concluded with a loving glance.

He looked at her blankly then rose from the bed and hurried to pour himself a glass of wine; he gulped a little then threw the glass in the fire and paced the room. She was startled.

“Good God, I shall never learn! Will I never be able to see your true feelings and wishes? I see only what I want to see! Again and again, it is all about my desires and… Oh heavens; I practically forced myself upon you.”

“William, please come here,” she demanded. She had to repeat her request two more times before he tentatively stepped closer the bed. She reached her hands to him, grabbed his arm and forced him to stay near her, then encircled his neck with her arms.

“My dear Mr. Darcy, allow me to tell you how much I love and admire you, though sometimes you are such an utter and complete fool! How could I reject you when I wanted nothing less than to have you close to me? Do you not know how I long for your kisses, for your caresses, for your warmth? How can you believe you forced me to accept you? Did I not tell you – did you not see yourself – how much joy, how much pleasure, how much bliss I find in your arms? You want to know if it was painful? Yes, it was; in truth, the first time was so painful that I thought my body was cut in two.”

“Elizabeth…”

“Let me finish, please! However, I would gladly bear ten times that pain for the happiness of feeling you with me…inside me! How can you doubt that you have seen my true feelings and wishes? Can you not feel my regard for you? If not, that would truly hurt me!”

“Elizabeth…” he interrupted her again.

“What?!” she cried unceremoniously, her tone almost livid; her face was now coloured by emotion, and her eyes were sparkling.

His strong palms cupped her face and he held her like that for a moment, speaking to her only with his eyes. He was still heavy hearted, she could see that, and the emotions of the day almost overwhelmed her; soon she could not bear his stare any longer.

“I would like to rest a little,” she said.

“Of course, my love.” He expected her to retire to her room, but she simply leaned back on the pillow and closed her eyes. He covered her, then lay by her side while his fingers played with her hair. She started to breathe steadily and cuddle against his chest.

After a while, he felt her moving in his arms. “William, we are such fools… Why did we argue, after all? I mean…we should have been very happy that…you know…after…”

“We did not argue, my love. We just… I do not know… It was my fault. I am the only fool here, you have to grant me that. A very happy fool, though,” he admitted as she laughed, and then she sighed and finally fell asleep.

***

It was quite difficult for Darcy to wake her an hour later. When he finally succeeded, she could barely open her eyes, so he offered her a little coffee. She was still in bed, so he brought her the cup while she tried to brush her hair with her fingers.

“You ordered fresh coffee,” she smiled. “Thank you, sir.”

“I am glad I can be of some use, from time to time,” he said, sitting at the edge of the bed.

“So now I should say you are always of some use, sir?” she teased him.

“As you wish, madam. I depend on your generosity to praise my good qualities.”

“Hmmm…” she watched him carefully. “You seem in a very good mood, sir. Have you slept as well?”

“No, I have not… I have employed my time much better,” he replied.

“Oh, I see,” she answered while she put her cup down and leaned closer to him. “And may I inquire what employment has made you so cheerful in such a short time.?”

“There is no secret, madam. I stayed here and watched you while you slept.”

She opened her eyes in surprise. “You watched me?”

He leaned toward her so they almost touched each other. “That I admired you, would be a better choice of words. And I recollected some very special moments…”

“Oh…” she found nothing more to say.

“Can you guess of what moments I am speaking?”

“I cannot, sir. And I have no time for these kinds of games; it is already very late. We must hurry at once.” She felt uncomfortable while she tried to arrange her gown and to climb out of bed, but he held her arm and she was forced to look at him. His fingers caressed her face and she stroked his cheeks in return.

“You did enjoy yourself today, did you not?” he suddenly asked, and her cheeks instantly turned crimson. She did not expect that conversation to start once more; however, he continued as his thumb brushed over her lips. “It was the first time you took your pleasure at almost the same moment I did; am I right? God, you were so beautiful, my love, and I was so happy I could see you… I love seeing you in the full light of day.”

“You are embarrassing me,” she whispered against his fingers.

“I thought we decided you would never feel embarrassed with me.”

“Truly sir, feeling embarrassed is not something I can control… I do not possess your self discipline…”she teased him. Her palm was still on his face and he turned his head so he could kiss her palm.

“My discipline always evaded me in your presence. As for mortifying you – please forgive me. I will try to be less honest in my expressions, if that would please you. ”

He gently pulled her back against the pillow. “You must learn to tell me what pleases you, Mrs. Darcy…”

She felt she was melting, incapable of replying while his fingers touched her lips and parted them slowly. His mouth abandoned tantalizing her hand and moved to her neck. “Is this pleasant enough, Mrs. Darcy?”

She licked her lips and turned her head to face him; she longed for his kisses, and when his mouth finally captured hers, she moaned with satisfaction. His body brushed against hers and her own body started moving beneath. She knew they should stop immediately and prepare for dinner, yet she wished – and hoped – that he would not remember their engagement. She was shocked to discover how much she desired his attention such a short while after their previous interlude, yet she could not help herself.

Her arms encircled his neck and his weight crushed her against the sheets; she felt herself burning inside and cold shivers travelling along her skin. She quivered, waiting for his touches.

And then he stopped and separated from her, struggling to breathe again. “We should start preparing for dinner, my love, or else we shall arrive when the others are leaving.”

She closed her eyes, struggling for air and only nodded in agreement. She was unable to speak – or to think – and all she hoped for was to regain some composure before she would have to return to her room.

His gentle kiss on her forehead made her open her eyes and she faced his joyful, mischievous glance. “Are you well, dearest? Shall I bring you some water? You look very flustered.”

He seemed amused and satisfied with himself – and Elizabeth was not pleased at all. Was he toying with her? He surely would not dare!

A sudden knock at the door startled her and she hurried up from the bed, desperately trying to arrange her gown. With no rush, Darcy put on his robe and opened the door, without allowing the servant to enter. In the meantime, Elizabeth brushed her gown and passed through the adjoining room to her chamber, disappearing before being seen in such a state. In the privacy of her room, she filled a glass of water and swallowed it instantly then poured another. Her thirst was not easy to slake.

As she began to breathe steadily again and prepared to call for her maid, Darcy appeared in the doorway.

“Why did you run?”

“Why? What kind of question is that? Surely I could not stay to be seen by your servant in such a state.”

“But I already told you there is no need to worry; no servant will never enter my bedroom without my permission. However, I imagine there will be times when he will see you in your indoor gowns, as I hope you will visit my room quite often.” He tried to tease her, but she was still uneasy

“You know very well that it was not about my indoor gown, but about my whole appearance. I looked as –”

“You looked as though you had just been passionately loved by your husband and were very willing to be loved again,” he said without even lowering his voice. “We can only hope that the next hours will pass very quickly and we will return to continue what we started.”

She blushed violently and did not have time to reply before he kissed her hand and left the room with the same mischievous smile on his face. He was indeed very pleased with himself; that was quite clear now.

She remembered those nights they spent together before being married; he told her she was torturing him with her caresses and with the power she had over him. Surely, that power was gone now – or was all in his hands. She blushed at her own choice of words – indeed it was all in his hands, in his kisses, in his…

‘Oh, that will not do!!! What is happening to me?’

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes and bit her lower lip. His self-confidence and her own weakness in the face of his mischievous little games deserved an immediate, proper response.

She changed her gown with a new one, then covered herself with a robe while she rang for the maid. She brushed her hair and pulled it back tightly; a quick glance in the mirror showed that she looked proper enough.

With a deep breath and fighting against the voice of her reason, which whispered to abandon her plan, Elizabeth stepped to her husband’s room. She knocked at the door and waited to be invited in. A short hesitation kept her in the doorway for a moment while her eyes met Darcy’s. His servant was just shaving him and Elizabeth remained disconcerted in front of them.

“May I be of some assistance to you, Mrs. Darcy?” asked the servant with perfect politeness.

“No…no, thank you…” she replied tentatively.

“May I be of some assistance, Mrs. Darcy?” inquired Darcy with a mischievous voice and a meaningful glance. That was enough to raise her courage to follow through on her little revenge.

“In fact, yes, you may, sir. I would like a word with you, only for a moment. There is a matter of some urgency I would like to discuss with you.”

“Now?” he asked, puzzled; then, with a gesture, he dismissed the servant.

“Elizabeth, what happened?” He sounded worried and she felt even more pleased with herself.

“Nothing really…” she smiled and leaned her head near his, as he remained in the chair. She put one hand on his shoulder and the other, daringly, rested on his thigh. Her lips were almost touching his ear as she whispered. “I just wanted to say that you were right about what happened earlier; I did enjoy myself…very much…in a very different way than before.”

She looked at his image in the mirror and saw his expression changing; she smiled and, very briefly, brushed her lips over his cheek. He turned his head toward her, but she withdrew before his mouth could capture hers. Only her fingers touched his lips for a moment, then she left. Just before she closed the door behind her, she cast a last, quick glance in the mirror, only to see a very astonished Darcy staring incredulously at her reflection.

She knew she should feel ashamed for her wanton flirtation, but she felt quite pleased: whatever power her husband might have over her, her own power was no less. She entered her room laughing, wondering how it was possible that she, Elizabeth Bennet, a country girl, not pretty enough once to tempt Mr. Darcy to dance with her, made him tremble only by whispering a few words and kissing his cheek. That was indeed extraordinary, and she enjoyed every moment of it!

~/~/~/~

Caroline Bingley was gone for only five days, and she was happier than ever before. Her tour with Lady Sophia was the most enjoyable time she had had in many years, and there were many long weeks ahead to anticipate. Accepting that invitation was the best thing she had ever done.

Of course, Lady Sophia had not been entirely honest with her – but Caroline forgave her, especially after her ladyship explained to her the reason for secrecy.

After all, she was correct: Charles would have never allowed her to leave if he had known that Lord Markham would be in Lady Sophia’s group!

Caroline was shocked to see Markham on the second day of their trip, and for some time she was not inclined to talk to him. She felt betrayed and hurt by his abominable behaviour two months earlier. She had invited him to the ball, hoping to enjoy his courtship, and instead he entered into that scandal with Eliza Bennet. That was outrageous.

However, Lord Markham proved to Caroline that his interest for her was still alive. He patiently allowed her time to recover from her anger; he continued to be polite with her without being too insistent, and she could not ignore his charming manners for long. Just the evening before, she allowed him the opportunity to explain what happened during that horrible night at Netherfield.

He admitted that he had imbibed an excess of brandy and did not even remember exactly what occurred. He did recollect that he went into the yard to take some fresh air and that Miss Bennet was there – but he was lost as to what happened next. He had some memory of somehow falling over a woman, and he suspected it was Miss Bennet, but the others pretended it was Lady Cassandra – so that was the best proof that, whatever he might have done that night, it was only the result of his state of confusion.

Moreover, he gave her the reason for his sudden departure. As he was an honourable man, he had even offered to marry Miss Bennet in order to accomplish his duty, but Mr. Bennet refused his offer. So, the next morning when he awoke and learned about the incident, he felt so ashamed that he preferred to leave the house immediately, without daring to see Caroline and beg her forgiveness. Even more, Lord Markham confessed that he had insisted that Lady Sophia allow him to join their group, precisely because he wanted to meet Caroline once more and win back her friendship.

At such an open declaration, Caroline surrendered completely. Her forgiveness was granted instantly, and all her hopes for an advantageous marriage to a handsome Earl were renewed. And this time, she had no doubts she was correct in her estimation, as that very morning the Earl sent her flowers – a most personal gesture – which proved his intentions very clearly.

However, she would not repeat the same errors: she would not acknowledge to anyone the unexpected developments until had she received a clear offer of marriage. Only after she had accepted the offer would she notify her family. This way neither Charles nor his friends would be able to interfere and ruin her future again!

~/~/~/~

Elizabeth and Darcy were in the carriage, face to face, silently staring at each other. They had barely spoken three words since they had left the house, and now it seemed that each was waiting for the other to make the first step. Both had hidden smiles in their eyes and each tried to conceal it. Biting her lips in an attempt to control her mirth, Elizabeth turned her eyes to the carriage window and watched the snow.

“It is lovely weather,” she said.

“Lovely indeed…though quite cold,” he admitted with perfect composure, his eyes locked on her face.

“I cannot wait to see Georgiana and Cassandra; I have missed them so much. I even missed the Colonel.”

“Yes…”

“Did you not miss them, sir?”

“In truth, I have just separated from them five days ago, and I had not much time to think of them lately. But I will be pleased to see my sister and my friends again.”

“Are you upset, sir? You do not seem very inclined to talk to me…” she said, sweetly.

“I am not upset; I am only astonished to see how much you have changed so soon after our marriage, Mrs. Darcy. You were such a sweet young lady before our wedding, and now you are quite evil. It seems you find great pleasure in tormenting your husband…among other things.”

His voice sounded very serious and preoccupied; Elizabeth burst out in laughter, just when the carriage stopped in front of Cassandra’s house. Darcy helped her out and directed her toward the main entrance, but she delayed him a moment.

“I do not deserve such censure, sir. I have never been a ‘sweet lady,’ nor am I evil now. I may, perhaps, be called ’impertinent,’ as I have always been – but I hoped you would be accustomed to it by now. As for tormenting my husband, I confess I enjoy doing it as much as he enjoys tormenting me. In this, we are even.”

Her eyebrow was arched in challenge and there was such a mix of sharpness and joy in her voice that he could not restrain his laughter; without considering the impropriety of his gesture, he pulled her to him and kissed her lips passionately. Fortunately for their reputations, it was snowing and there were few people on the street.

Soon enough, Cassandra’s butler opened the door and started coughing meaningfully until the couple finally noticed him.

“Good day, Simons, how are you?”

“Good day, Mr. Darcy, and welcome. I am very well indeed, thank you, sir.”

“Have you met Mrs. Darcy before?”

Elizabeth smiled and the servant bowed to her. “I met the former Miss Bennet a few months ago. I am very happy to meet you again, Mrs. Darcy. May I congratulate you on your wedding?”

“Thank you,” she replied kindly and finally entered followed by her husband.

Simons was just taking their coats when Georgiana hurried to her and threw herself into Elizabeth’s arms. She kissed the girl’s cheeks and embraced her tightly, almost tearful at such an open display of affection.

“Elizabeth, I missed you so much! Let me look at you – you are so beautiful! You seem very changed since we last met, though it was only a week ago!”

“Oh come now, dearest, I agree that Elizabeth looks beautiful, but I doubt she has actually changed in a week,” replied Darcy, amused.

Georgiana turned to greet her brother, and he kissed her forehead tenderly.

“I have to say that I agree with Georgiana; you look more beautiful than ever, Mrs. Darcy,” the Colonel intervened, approaching them and bowing to Elizabeth.”

“As for you, cousin,” the Colonel continued turning to Darcy, “you are changed, too.”

“Really?” Darcy replied while shaking his hand. “Do I also look ‘more beautiful than ever?’”

“Heaven forbid, Darcy, I have never considered a man to be beautiful; that is a word I use only for ladies.”

“You do look different, brother…” Georgiana said. “You look more… I cannot find the proper word…”

“Perhaps more ‘married’ would be the word?” Darcy replied and all started to laugh; he offered Elizabeth his arm as they walked toward the dining room.

“Or perhaps ‘happy’ would be the proper word…” Darcy whispered to Elizabeth. She only squeezed his arm as he covered her hand with his palm.

“Oh, look who is finally here!” Cassandra exclaimed from the settee where she was arranged. She was half lying, half sitting, supported by some pillows and Elizabeth hurried to embrace her.

“You look very well, Cassandra, very well, indeed! I am so happy to see you!”

“And you look beautiful, my dear. I dare say that marriage suits you very well…better than any other young woman I have seen in a long time…” Cassandra said with affection.

“That is because she wisely chose the proper husband,” Darcy intervened, approaching his friend and kissing her hand. “You do look very well, Cassandra, that is true.”

“Thank you, ‘Elizabeth’s proper husband!’” laughed Cassandra.

Their little chat continued until dinner was ready; a small table was arranged so that Cassandra could reach the plate. Elizabeth and Georgiana were seated on either side of Cassandra, and the two gentlemen were opposite to them.

The dinner was a bittersweet affair; their small gathering was warm and friendly; they chatted and teased each other and made plans … as much as it was possible.

The subject of the Colonel’s departure was discussed for some time, mostly between Darcy, Georgiana and the Colonel himself.

Though preoccupied with meeting her husband’s glances as frequently as possible, Elizabeth did not fail to notice the behaviour of Cassandra and the Colonel, nor their distress bordering on sadness or their unsuccessful attempts to appear easy and joyful. They were not seeking each other’s eyes – as were Elizabeth and Darcy – quite the contrary: they seemed to avoid facing each other, yet they forced their smiles all the time.

“When will you leave for Pemberley?” the Colonel asked Darcy.

“The day after tomorrow.”

“Will you take Georgiana with you?” the Colonel continued, and all eyes were turned to Darcy, waiting for his answer. Elizabeth blushed, Cassandra smiled and Georgiana seemed worried.

“Oh brother, please allow me to stay with Cassandra until Christmas,” the young girl pleaded, to Darcy’s utter relief. “We will come to Pemberley together in less than six weeks.”

“Of course I will allow you, dearest… I mean, if this is acceptable to Cassandra.”

“Cassandra wants me to stay, do you not?” the girl asked for her friend’s agreement, and Cassandra approved heartily.

“I certainly want you here, sweetie. This is settled, then; see Georgie, I told you Darcy would not object to your staying in Town, as you were afraid,” she added with a mischievous smile which made Darcy gulp some wine and Elizabeth stare at her plate.

“That sounds like a good arrangement,” the Colonel said gravely. “I think Georgiana’s presence will be very good for Cassandra, considering she is not yet completely recovered.”

“I will take care of her, do not worry,” Georgiana assured him.

The Colonel smiled at her while he cast a very quick glance toward Cassandra. “I do not worry, dearest. You are a very trustworthy young lady, Georgiana.”

“I hope you will join us at Pemberley for Christmas, too, Colonel,” said Elizabeth. “We do count on your presence, you know.”

“You are very kind, Mrs. Darcy. I will try to be there, however I cannot make a promise that I am not certain I will be able to keep. The army is not a place for making long term plans, you know.”

“I know, sir; however, we will hope and pray to see you there,” she concluded, and the Colonel thanked her with a warm smile of gratitude.

“The entire Bennet family will be there…” Darcy addressed his cousin. “And the Bingleys and the Hursts and maybe Caroline Bingley too… I do count on your presence, you see…” he added meaningfully and Elizabeth looked at him with mocking reproach while the others started to laugh.

Cassandra’s face was pale, despite the smile on her lips, and she barely spoke at all for the rest of the evening. When Georgiana inquired about her lack of humour, she blamed her fatigue, and that was the sign for Darcy to announce their departure. Cassandra thanked them for their presence, without even trying to delay them. Hesitantly, the Colonel offered to remain a little longer, in case his help was needed to take Cassandra to her room. She agreed and expressed her gratitude, with distant politeness.

Darcy and Elizabeth said their goodbyes, promising to visit them briefly the next day, before leaving Town. Georgiana said she would wait for them happily – Cassandra said nothing.

Colonel Fitzwilliam accompanied them outside and kissed Elizabeth’s hand as she entered the carriage. The snow continued to fall, steadily – it was all whiteness and silence.

Only a few moments later, Darcy followed her, and the carriage moved slowly. He put his arm around her shoulders and tenderly caressed her face.

“You spent quite some time watching the snow,” he said.

“I love when it snows…” She leaned her head against him.

“Then you will love Pemberley in winter”

“I will love Pemberley anytime, since it is your home.”

He took her hand, then suddenly chuckled. “I was so lost for words when David asked me if we would be bringing Georgiana with us!” “Yes, I noticed that; I felt very embarrassed too, because we did not even talk about her. I really hope she did not feel neglected.”

“She would have felt more neglected if she had joined us, as I plan to selfishly engage all your time, Elizabeth. I am not quite ready to share you with anyone.”

She only smiled; he had expected more of a reaction.

“What is the matter, my dear? Your thoughts seem to be elsewhere. Or perhaps you are displeased with the prospect of being alone with me for more than a month?”

“Oh, that remark does not even deserve an answer,” she replied with mocking severity.

“Then what is it?”

“It is Cassandra.”

“Cassandra? But she looked very well indeed; she has improved greatly in the last week.”

“Yes, she did look well…but she is so sad…and so is the Colonel. I cannot stand to see them like that.”

“Oh, I understand. Elizabeth, there is little we can do in this matter.”

“I know…but I cannot help thinking of us…of our situation a few months ago…”

“My dearest, things are completely different with them. There are no misunderstandings, no secrets between them! The Colonel declared his affection and his intention toward Cassandra, openly and honestly. She is well aware of his feelings, and all she has to do is recognize her own wishes. David was a perfect gentleman when he decided not to pressure her any longer and to wait patiently for her decision. You know I am very fond of Cassandra and I would do anything to protect her. However, I cannot see any fault in David’s behaviour toward her, and I do not believe she is in any danger from him. Would you not agree?”

“I do agree. Though I was quite upset with the Colonel at times, I must admit that his devotion and care for Cassandra has been beyond reproach. It is just that…they seemed unable to speak to each other…to confess what they want. No, not both of them – only Cassandra.”

“Cassandra is a very courageous woman, my dear. Things will settle between them eventually, I am very confident.”

Though her heart was still heavy with worry, Elizabeth accepted her husband’s conclusions for the moment, as they had just reached their home.

***

David placed Cassandra on her bed and sat near her. As he had carried her from the dining room, her arms were still encircled around his neck, and he gently pulled his arm from behind her knees.

For a moment they remained still, their bodies touching with every breath, their eyes locked.

“I should leave,” he said.

“Yes…”

“I am glad to know Georgiana will stay with you. You need someone to care for you.”

Cassandra smiled. “There is no need to worry for my health; I have thirty servants to take care of me.”

“You need someone to care for you,” he repeated soundly.

“David?”

“Yes?”

“I am sorry that…”

He pressed his fingers upon her lips. “Cassandra, I do not want to start another discussion and I do not want you to apologize to me – ever again.”

“Very well…but please be cautious…be careful… I want nothing more than to be sure you will return safely.”

“Cassandra, I must be sincere with you: my hope is that you will want much more from me than to return safely. In the meantime, I give you my word that I will be cautious. I have no intention of letting myself be killed…” he smiled, but her face darkened.

“Please do not speak in jest about this…”

“Forgive me; I only tried to cheer you a little…”

“I know… David, you promised you will allow me time to decide – and you kept your promise. And I will keep mine; when we next meet, I shall give you my final answer – if you will still be interested to hear it…”

“Do you doubt that, Cassandra? Do you doubt the depth of my feelings?!”

“I do not doubt you…but I know the paths of the heart can take unexpected turns.”

“My heart is not as unsteady as you think…” he paused and looked at her intently. “Cassandra, I will confess something to you, but you must promise you will take it more like a jest. I would not want you to be upset with me, though I know my confession may sound highly improper.”

“David, what are you trying to tell me?”

“I am trying to tell you about the first time I fell in love with you; I never told anyone because I was deeply ashamed of my feelings, considering that I watched you growing up, almost like my sister and, even more, for a long time I was certain you would end up marrying Darcy.”

“Oh come now, David,” she laughed nervously. “Do not tell me you have loved me since I was ten…”

“No, thank God, not since you were ten, but close,” he replied as nervous as she. “I first saw you not as my friend, but as the most beautiful woman…at your ball…when you were seventeen. I had not seen you in years, so when you appeared before my eyes…I could not believe it was you – I simply could not take my eyes off of you; I could not stand being separate from you, not even for a moment. It was the first time in my life that I felt my heart aching with desire to be close to a woman – to you. Please do not misunderstand me, not for a second did I think of anything improper… Just that … I know it might sound ridiculous, but I truly, deeply fell in love with you back then, though you were almost yet a child. I do not think you remember much of that ball, but for me it was a night of torture and delight… Do you remember you danced the first set with me? Your first ‘official’ dance…”

“Oh God, David,” she whispered tearfully. “Of course I remember everything about that ball…and no, that evening I was not a child any longer. Yes, I do remember quite vividly every moment of that night…”

Cassandra seemed so distressed, her suffering so obvious, that David looked at her disconcerted and regretful, not knowing what to do, and furious with himself for that imprudent confession. How stupid he was! He took everything in jest, but, for her, the recollection of the time when her parents were still alive was nothing but cause for more grief.

“Cassandra, I beg you to forgive me, I did not want to… I was such a fool! I hoped you would be amused, I hoped you would at least smile a bit, and instead I brought back only painful memories and made you cry. How could I be so thoughtless?”

He rose and, averting his eyes, bowed politely to her. “I had better leave; I should have left much earlier.”

“David!”

She grabbed his arm and forced him to return to his place near her. Her lips opened to speak, but no words came out; instead, she looked at him with an expression he had never seen before.

Incredulous, David watched her as she leaned her head toward his and felt her lips approaching his face. His mouth ached with desire to feel hers, but her soft kiss rested on his cheek, then her whisper burned his skin.

“Do not worry about my crying, David. Though you see tears, my heart does smile. And no, you did not bring back only painful memories – I truly thank you for remembering me at that ball. You surely are neither thoughtless nor a fool. Please do not apologize to me – ever again.”

An hour later, in the carriage taking him to his regiment, Colonel Fitzwilliam was still incredulous about their last conversation. He could still feel the touch of Cassandra’s lips on his face while he wondered how it was possible that his silly confession made her heart smile.

****

A few streets away, still preoccupied with the situation of Cassandra and the Colonel, Elizabeth was staring through the window, waiting for her husband. He had some important letters to finish for the next morning, and he was already an hour late; she became impatient and tired.

She lay on the bed, snuggling between the sheets. Surely, he would wake her when he came to bed. She closed her eyes, trying to find his scent in the pillows. But there was no trace of him there, as a servant changed the bedclothes each evening. He would come soon; she knew it. He had slept with her every night since they were married. Would he continue this habit at Pemberley? Or were other rules to be followed there?

Suddenly her mind was invaded by the memories of her first visit to Pemberley. The torment in her heart, the uncertainties, Cassandra’s little jokes, the day in the grove, the storm when he took her on his horse, that night when he entered her room and held her hand. Then the revelation of his lasting love, the happiness, the hopes and the news about Lydia shattering all her dreams. The sadness, the pain breaking her heart – the rain falling upon Pemberley when she had left unexpectedly, without any hope of seeing him again. She was certain she had lost him forever.

She had almost lost him forever not once, but twice: first when she rejected him with all the power of her prejudiced anger, wanting to punish him; and, second, when she ran away from him, the power of her love trying to protect him.

How would life have been without him? He was away only for an hour and she missed him heartily. She missed his warmth, his tender smile, his loving eyes…and she nearly lost all those forever… No, she did not almost lose them – even worse: she almost never discovered them.

“William!” She jumped from the bed and promptly entered his room, not even noticing that she was only wearing her nightdress as the robe lay forgotten on the chair. Darcy was at his desk, reading some papers; his servant was preparing his belongings for the trip. Her entrance startled them both; the servant instantly exited the room while Darcy hurried to her.

“My love, what happened? You look so pale…and you are trembling. Are you hurt?”

“No, no, nothing happened. Just hold me, please…” she whispered, her arms around his waist and her head pressed against his chest.

He wrapped her with his arms and took her to his bed, lying down together. He tried to cover her with the sheets, but she would not let go of his waist. He gently caressed her hair, her arms, her back, while his legs entwined with hers. Her toes were frozen and she continued to tremble for a few minutes.

“Elizabeth, you worry me… Please talk to me, dearest.”

“I missed you so much,” she whispered, and he was astonished and even more worried.

“I missed you too, my beautiful wife.” Lost for other words, he held her in silence, hoping she would recover soon and confess to him what happened.

About a quarter of an hour later, when Darcy was certain she had fallen asleep, Elizabeth lifted her head and looked at him. Her face was still a little disconcerted, but she seemed calmer.

He removed a lock of hair from near her ear. “So, what happened? Besides the fact that you missed me, which is easy to understand, considering I am a man without fault and I have ten thousand a year.”

His teasing tone spread a smile on her face, while tears appeared in the corners of her eyes and she wiped them away. “I really missed you, that was the reason. I waited for you and I started thinking about the trip to Pemberley…and I remembered everything that passed in the last year…and how close I was to losing you, and…I just wanted to see you. Forgive me for interrupting you, I will let you continue now…”

He pressed his fingers on her lips to silence her. “Mrs. Darcy, you should never apologize for coming into my room. Besides that, I confess that I am truly disappointed with your confession. What has happened to your philosophy? Did you not teach me to ‘think only of the past as its remembrance gives you pleasure’? Did you betray your own conviction?”

“Yes, so it seems,” she admitted, smiling through tears.

He kissed her tears away and caressed her hair. “You must promise me you will always be faithful to this philosophy from now on, as I depend on you to remind me of it whenever I become trapped by unpleasant memories.”

“I shall try…but it is not very easy, you know…”

“I know it is not very easy, but you, my love, can conquer anything.”

“I am afraid you give me too much credit, sir,” she laughed.

“I disagree… I trust my wife completely…since I was wise enough to choose the most perfect wife.” His voice was light and tender and his eyes were smiling at her.

“Do you remember our brief talk in the parsonage…about Mr. Collins and his choice of a wife?” she inquired, trying to ease the conversation.

“I certainly do. And do you remember how ridiculous I was in my attempt at being around you? I hated the Colonel for all the time he spent with you.”

“You did not!”

“I most certainly did! I was so frightened that he would propose to you! That evening at Rosings, when you were playing and he was sitting next you… I truly, deeply hated him those moments.”

She laughed, light-hearted, and climbed up to his chest to place small kisses over his neck. “You know, Elizabeth, I thought about bringing a small piano here, in your rooms…” he whispered.

“As you wish sir, she replied as her lips travelled along his jaw line. However, you must remember I am not truly proficient at the instrument.”

“I know perfectly well all your proficiencies, Mrs. Darcy. Still, I would dearly like you to perform only for me…with no strangers around.”

She paused from her attentions and looked at him in wonder. “Do you remember everything that we talked of in the past, sir?”

“I do…and it seems you do too, or else how could you recognize the words I remember?”

“That was a very complicated phrase indeed, sir,” she laughed with all her heart and their lips finally met in a passionate, long-lasting kiss.

They had to separate, eventually, to seek air, and Darcy barely managed to articulate a few words. “Shall we stay in my room for the night or return to yours?”

“As you wish…but what about your papers? Do you not have to finish them?”

“The papers are my last concern for the moment,” he said and, to Elizabeth’s surprise, disappeared behind the door. He returned some moments later.

“I dismissed Gerald for the night; he will finish packing tomorrow after we wake up, and I will finish the letters before breakfast,” he explained calmly while returning to bed.

“Gerard was in the hall this whole time?”

“Of course…he had an unfinished task and he only left the room for discretion. He would not leave without my order.”

“Oh my…what will he think of me?”

“I am not certain…probably he will think the mistress is so much in love with the master that she has no respect for rules or propriety when she bursts into his rooms,” he teased her.

She felt ashamed for a moment, and tried to respond, then abandoned any attempt and sighed deeply. “Well, Gerard would be very correct,” she admitted, just before Darcy rolled her on her back and covered her with his weight. Her fingers slid into his hair; their faces were only a few inches apart, their eyes, darkened by desire, staring into each other’s.

“So, Mrs. Darcy… shall we continue from where we were interrupted this afternoon?”

“No…” she licked her lips, her heart racing wildly.

“No?” he was puzzled and disconcerted.

“No…please, no more words, no more teasing, no more games… I only want to feel you…just you…”

For a moment, he did not understand her meaning, but soon her pleading eyes, still wearing the traces of tears on her eyelashes, made everything clear. Never averting his eyes from hers, he slowly removed his shirt; the candles were still burning and she could see small drops of sweat on his bare shoulders. He leaned down and gently pulled up her nightdress; she closed her eyes and arched her body so he could remove the cloth completely. With her eyes still closed, her skin shivering from a chill, she felt his moves and knew what he was doing. A moment later, he pulled all the sheets away from her and lay upon her, covering her only with his naked body. His hands captured her and trapped them at each side of her head; their fingers entwined instantly.

“Open your eyes,” he whispered as he kissed her eyelashes. She obeyed and their gazes met again.

Slowly, his legs separated hers; she swallowed and licked her lips. He kissed her only briefly then released her hands. She encircled his neck, but he kept his distance so he could see her face. His hands travelled down along her body, rested on her hips a moment, and then stroked her thighs. She moaned. He lifted her legs to encircle his waist and placed another soft kiss on her dry lips; she struggled to keep her eyes open and held her breath.

He entered her slowly, inch by inch, and a cry escaped her as her body tensed. He paused and then continued with gentle moves, his intense gaze never leaving her face. Her eyes closed of their own will, while the sensations overwhelmed her. It was too slow, tortuously slow, and she tightened her legs around his waist to pull him closer. He kissed her again, and with a last thrust, their bodies were finally united; she sighed then relaxed and opened her eyes to watch him.

Equally slowly, he began to move inside her, bare skin burning bare skin. He seemed infinitely patient, with no trace of the urgency which had driven his passion the previous nights. His hands took hers and held them over her head; his mouth captured her lips and his tongue tasted them greedily. She wanted her hands free to touch him, to explore him – but she was a prisoner with no escape from his passion; and she adored the sensation of complete surrender to him. However, she could not remain trapped for long; she was eager and inpatient – eager not to be free, but to be conquered even more. Her hips lifted toward his and she cried when she felt him deeper inside her; she started to move beneath him, against him, their bodies brushing against one another. His chest was painfully crushing her breasts and she struggled to breathe under his weight. She broke their kiss in search for air; and then, without knowing what she was doing, she bit his shoulder. He moaned and his mouth sought hers, but she avoided it. Her tongue tasted his throat and sucked his skin then bit him again, gently. He cried her name and thrust inside her even harder – and she bit him again.

And then she felt a violent move and – with great surprise – discovered he had rolled on his back and now she was lying atop him. Their hands were still joined; her breasts crushed against his chest; her legs encircled his waist, trapped beneath him. She remained still for a moment, their faces only a few inches apart, staring at each other without a word. She could feel him pulsing inside her and her hips startled instinctively. He lifted his body, so she could remove her legs, and his movement pulled him deeper inside her. Her moan was the sign he needed. His hands separated from hers and embraced her bare back, stroking her skin along her spine from her shoulder to her waist, while his movements increased.

For a moment, she seemed to have lost her rhythm, but his strong palms lingered on her hips, squeezing gently, then guiding her body until it matched his pace. She learned quickly and her renewed confidence made her even more daring. As much as she liked being trapped beneath him earlier, she enjoyed experiencing the novelty of being free from his weight, to discover she could breathe easily, she could move easily, and could use this freedom to her benefit – and his. She slid her fingers into his hair and squeezed it as he was squeezing her thighs. He tried to laugh, but he groaned with pleasure instead. She lifted her body a moment and her breasts brushed against his hairy chest; the sensation sent shivers across her skin, and she instantly repeated the gesture.

“Oh God, Elizabeth,” he cried and his voice brought her as much pleasure as his long, deep thrusts which turned wilder with every moment.

She managed to keep her body moving together with his while she leaned toward his ear. Her full breasts pressed against his chest and his short, curly hair tickled her swollen nipples. The sensation was unbearable and, impulsively, she bit his earlobe as she whispered incoherently, “Is this pleasant enough, Mr. Darcy?”

“God, yes, yes!” he articulated breathlessly, and with the same violent move, he rolled her back against the pillow while he reclaimed his place upon her. She was surprised – again – but only for a second. Instantly her legs entwined around him and her arms encircled his back, stroking his skin; he moved inside her stronger, harder and deeper, and his mouth captured hers once more in a kiss deep, possessive, and impatient, which mirrored the rhythm of their bodies unleashed in their need for fulfilment. When

the moment finally came, he broke the kiss and demanded she open her eyes again, so they could see each other as their faces transfigured into the most blissful pleasure and their swollen lips cried one another’s names.

They remained united, silent and still, only he rolled their joined bodies to unburden her from his weight.

A couple of minutes later, Darcy covered her with a sheet and his hand stroked her long, silky hair, which was caressing his sweat-drenched skin. She chuckled and he became very intrigued – that was not the kind of reaction he was expecting.

“Is something the matter?” he asked.

“No, nothing really…it is just that…I am happy to be your wife.”

Though her reply took him by surprise, he could not repress a deeply satisfied smile, which she could not see, but could “hear” in his voice.

“I see… And my I dare ask the reason for this sudden confession, at this particular time of night, Mrs. Darcy? Does this have anything to do with my…income of ten thousand a year?”

Trying to repress her laugh, flustered and slightly embarrassed, her fingers touched his chin tentatively. “You sound very pleased with yourself and quite impertinent, Mr. Darcy.”

He took her hand and placed soft kisses on each of her fingers. “I am very pleased with myself; I have no reason to deny that. And I am waiting for you to tell me about your happiness…”

He teased her and he could see she was amused, so he expected a sharp reply.

“My happiness has nothing to do with your fortune or with other things you have in mind, sir.” He raised his eyebrow in disbelief, and she laughed while her cheeks coloured.

“Very well, I will admit it has to do with some of the things you have in mind…”

His glance was a mix of tenderness and teasing. “I can see you are happy, Mrs. Darcy – not just today, but every day since we married. I see your eyes sparkling with joy and your lips smiling; I can feel your happiness, Elizabeth. Your happiness as my wife is what pleases me.”

“Then you should be very pleased with yourself, husband, for I am not just happy, but grateful to be your wife. I am very serious now, William. As I told you when I came to your room earlier, I cannot stop wondering about how fortunate I have been in marrying you.”

“We were both fortunate – or better say we were both wise in choosing whom we married,” he replied, his lips still pressed against her fingers.

“You were wise, sir, in choosing your wife,” she agreed and he laughed at her self-confidence. “A woman can hardly choose – she can only hope she will gain the affection of a worthy man whom she can respect and appreciate. Of course, a woman can accept or reject any man’s attentions – but not more. It is a man’s privilege to choose.”

“Sometimes, a man’s privilege of choosing means nothing when he does not know to use that privilege properly and does not know how to bestow his attentions upon the woman he has chosen.”

“And sometimes a woman cannot see the worthiness of the man for whom she has waited and hoped her entire life!”

“I did nothing to display my worthiness, Elizabeth. It was more my fault than yours.”

“Oh, I do not intend to argue for the greater share of blame annexed to the beginning of our acquaintance or to that evening in Kent," said Elizabeth. “But I know I have every reason to feel grateful and fortunate; my prejudice and my hasty, unwise estimation of your character almost made me lose the path to true happiness.”

“May I dare hope I am your true happiness?”

“Yes you are, sir. Perhaps this is why I am childish sometimes. It seems I wonder at my fortune and cannot overcome the fear of losing it.”

His eyes softened with tenderness; she looked very serious, and Darcy playfully kissed her lips briefly. “My dearest, are we speaking about the past again?”

“No, we are speaking about the present. About you and about our marriage,” she said. “About what I hoped from our union and what I have been offered since our wedding.”

“That is such a sensible subject that I am afraid to ask. Did you expect me to be a horrible husband and life with me to be a torture, and now you are astonished to see I am a reasonably decent man?”

Neither his tease nor his attempt to put her at ease escaped Elizabeth.

“I did not expect you to be a horrible husband, quite the contrary,” she smiled. “But you exceeded my expectations,” she admitted and his look flustered her.

“Truly? In what way?”

“You seem to demand praise, sir, or better, you challenge me to praise you!”

“And I hope you will accept the challenge, Mrs. Darcy.”

She could not help laughing, and he briefly kissed her lips again. “Miss Bingley taught you a very bad habit, sir, by praising you all the time. I have no intention to spoil you even more.”

However, her gestures contradicted her words; she leaned against his chest, and her fingers touched his face with tender care. “You are spoiling me right now, you know,” he whispered.

“Am I?” she smiled mischievously.

“Elizabeth…”

“Yes?”

“Do you know what I adore most in you?”

“Please tell me…”

“Your eyes… I have loved them since the very beginning of our acquaintance. I can read so many things in your eyes, as they are a door to your soul…”

“Do you know what I adore most in you, husband?”

“Besides my income and my situation in life?”

She laughed and nodded. “Yes…and despite being tall and uncommonly handsome.”

“Hm… Now you have made me even more curious to hear your praises, because if we put aside my wealth and my features, I doubt there is much to adore in me.” He cast her a meaningful look, and she blushed instantly.

“I adore exactly what I hated when we first met: your behaviour toward me. I could not imagine a more considerate and kind husband …”

“Considerate and kind?” he interrupted her soundly. “Madam, of what are you talking? Something must be very wrong in this marriage if, after five days of intimacy, my young wife describes me in such brotherly terms.”

She chuckled, but his frown remained, and she started to laugh heartily. “Allow me to finish, sir, before you become upset with me. So, as I said – you are kind and considerate…” she paused and moved further so her face was at the same level with his. “…and gentle, and generous and tender and loving and passionate...” A mischievous smile overspread her lips and her mouth moved closer to his.

“This is a much better – and much more comforting – description, madam,” he replied while his lips tried to capture hers. However, her head moved closer to his ear and continued to whisper “…and…”

Her lips were touching his ear and for a moment he was certain he misheard her. Then her laughter hidden on his shoulder increased his surprise and he stared at her incredulous. “Mrs. Darcy, what did you say?” he inquired with mocking severity.

She instantly rolled on her other side and turned her back to him, covering herself with the sheet. “Elizabeth, tell me what you said – immediately.”

She was indeed behaving childishly, and Darcy adored her playfulness; he knew that was another sign of how confident and comfortable she felt in his company. His first impulse was to take her in his arms again – but he had to settle this business first. “Elizabeth? I am still waiting and I hope we will clarify things before dawn, so we might find some sleep tonight.”

“I said ‘aloof and demanding,’, ” she finally replied, barely keeping her composure.

“No, you did not, madam. You said ‘loving and passionate’ and…?” She continued to press her head against the pillow and he could hear her peals of laughter. He leaned upon her so his lips could reach her ear. “Mrs. Elizabeth Darcy, did you, by any chance, say ‘hard and large’ ?!” he asked with disbelief and her laughter instantly invaded the room.

He continued to stare at her back, covered by her long, curly hair weaving over her shoulders to nearly her waist; Elizabeth seemed to feel his stare and, a few moments later, turned to face him, her palm still covering her face. Only when their eyes met did his pretended severity vanish, and he finally allowed his amusement to burst forth.

“I am sorry; I hope you did not mind,” she managed to articulate.

He frowned again and his mocking seriousness returned. “Should I mind? Were these words among those things you said you adored in me or something you were complaining about?”

Elizabeth hesitated a moment and her cheeks burned; she managed to lock his challenging glance while she replied daringly. “I have nothing to complain about you, husband.”

Her smile became more warm and tender, and her head rested on his chest again. “We should sleep now, William; it must be very late.” She sighed and brushed her cheek against his skin while her palm gently caressed him; and, finally, she placed a soft, brief kiss upon his heart.

His arm encircled her shoulder. “Sleep well, my love.” She whispered something while her hand continued to caress him; she was obviously very tired and her breathing became more and more regular, however, her caresses seemed to increase too. Eventually, his hand stopped hers.

“Elizabeth, you should not continue to do that if you truly wish to sleep,” he whispered.

She opened her eyes to him. “What did I do?”

“Nothing much…” he smiled. “Except that each of your touches gives me shivers…and ‘sleep’ is the last thing I have in mind.

Elizabeth stared at him, eyes opened in disbelief. “Surely you cannot mean…”

His only reply was a twist of his lips.

“But…we just finished…and it was the second time today…”

Her astonishment was a new reason for his amusement; he kissed her hand and embraced her more closely, trying to dissipate her worry. “Do not be afraid, my love. I will never force you nor insist upon anything you do not want. And you may touch me as much as you like – I will gladly bear the torture of your caresses with the last remnants of my self control,” he teased her. “Now let us sleep.”

She shook her head in disagreement. “I am not afraid of anything you may do, William; I know you would never force me – with anything. And it is not that I do not want. It is just I really feel exhausted now…”

“My love, I know you are exhausted,” he smiled and kissed her temple. “I also know you did not sleep much lately – in fact, I wonder if you slept enough a single night in the last couple of months.”

A few more moments of silence followed.

“William?”

“Yes, Elizabeth?”

“May I ask…how is it that, except for our wedding night…it only happened once every evening and then we would sleep. Yet today we already…you know…twice…and you still do not seem tired.”

Darcy embraced her tightly and removed a lock of hair from her ear. “I was not tired before either,” he smiled. “I only struggled to balance my desires with my concern. I could not stay away from you, but I tried to take under consideration your lack of experience, your fears, and your discomfort. As you said earlier, I mostly exercised the ‘kind and considerate’ side of my character.”

“I see…” she whispered, not knowing what to say.

“From now on, my dearest, loveliest wife, as you have proven that I no longer have reason to be concerned, I intend to fully exercise my loving, passionate side – as you described it earlier.”

His deep, flirtatious voice and the gentle touch of his fingers near her ear sent shivers across her skin, and she tried very hard to smile while she felt her face and neck burning.

“I see,” she repeated.

“This is why I would strongly advise you to stop any further conversation about this subject and to try to sleep as soon as you can,” he concluded with another soft kiss upon her lips.

“Good night, husband,” she said, cuddling to his chest.

“Good night, my love,” he replied, being certain he could not possibly fall asleep with her warm body pressed to his. However, as she said, he was not tired at all. He would allow her to rest as much as she needed while he watched her beautiful face smiling in her dreams.

She was truly happy – of that, he had no doubt. http://www.hyacinthgardens.com/garden/index.php?showtopic=3407&st=1269